“Joking about Kristi Noem’s marriage going t*ts up”: Comedians react to Kristi Noem filing for divorce

U.S. Special Envoy for the Shield of the Americas Kristi Noem filed for divorce from her husband of 34 years, Bryon Noem, in Hamlin County, South Dakota, citing irreconcilable differences.

According to court records obtained by MS NOW, Kristi’s lawyers signed the documents on April 6; however, they weren’t filed until September 28.

Author, performer, actor, comedian, and podcaster Leslie Gaar reacted to the news via Threads. She wrote:

“Can’t believe y’all are joking about Kristi Noem’s marriage going t*ts up.”

Gaar was seemingly joking about images of Bryon Noem published by The Daily Mail in March that showed him cross-dressing and using fake breasts.

Another writer, actor, and comedian Jay Jurden also reacted to Kristi Noem’s divorce. He wrote on Threads:

“Kristi Noem said this bra ain’t big enough for the both of us.”

Montana-based comedian, author, and podcaster Paul Osincup also joined the conversation. He wrote on the platform:

“Turns out Kristi just didn’t really Noem.”

Online satirist Vinny Thomas also weighed in.

“Hey, you guys, I don’t think it’s in the Bible that you can get divorced if your husband wears enormous gigantic gazooms, so, I’m worried Kristi Noem will not inherit the kingdom of God. God never said anything about allowing divorce if your husband is wearing his big, sweet chariots online. There is nothing in the Bible about that,” Thomas sarcastically wrote.

He further wrote in the comment section:

“When all God’s creations sing, will not Bryon’s enormous t*****s be in the choir??”

The Noems have yet to publicly address the divorce.

All you need to know about Kristi Noem’s marriage

Kristi Noem tied the knot with Bryon Noem in Watertown, South Dakota, in 1992. They share three children and four grandchildren.

In 2021, conservative outlet American Greatness reported that Kristi was having an affair with political campaigner Corey Lewandowski. She refuted the report and called it a “disgusting lie.” Noem further added:

“These old, tired attacks on conservative women are based on a falsehood that we can’t achieve anything without a man’s help.”

Last September, New York magazine doubled down on the report and claimed Kristi was allegedly dating Corey, who helped her run the Department of Homeland Security as her “de facto chief of staff.” Back then, she was serving as the DHS Secretary. Noem was later fired from the role in early 2026 following a Senate hearing.

In 2026, Axios reporter Marc Caputo received an anonymous tip that an online pr*stitute wanted to go public about Bryon Noem’s involvement in bimbofication role play. In March, The Daily Mail published a report that Kristi Noem’s husband paid thousands of dollars to sex workers and allegedly told them that he enjoyed “huge, huge, ridiculous b**bs.”

The media outlet also published a photograph showing Bryon wearing pink shorts and a peach cropped top, using balloons to simulate breasts. His cross-dressing sparked controversy as it was in direct contrast to his wife’s opposition to drag performers and LGBTQ+ rights.

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Back then, Kristi’s representative told The New York Post that she was “devastated” by the news and her family was “blindsided.” The rep. also asked for privacy and prayers on her behalf.

Now, amid her divorce reports, Kristi’s attorney Michael Sabers told MS NOW that his client has “great faith” in the South Dakota judicial system and would “reserve any further comments for the legal process.” In addition to the divorce filing, a temporary restraining order has also been submitted to the court that prevents both parties from transferring assets or disturbing the peace of the other.

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