Not All Heroes Wear Capes...Not All Heroes Are Heroes: General Hospital Two Scoops for the Week of June 8th

General Hospital's Britt Westbourne said it herself. When Lucas got the idea to steal her meds so she could reverse engineer them, he seemed to waltz into her office with a little invisible cape, ready to play hero. Well, Lucas didn't have a cape, but he did have a bulletproof vest and had his chance in the sun, literally.

Our Lucas got to play with the big kids two weeks in a row and pull off an almost-perfect sting operation. Well, Lucas' part was perfect. The cop part was not. Now, Lucas is the unlikely action hero we never knew we needed. So, this week's Two Scoops is dedicated to Dr. Lucas Jones, a man who would make his namesake proud. We know Laura sure is.

What He Did For Love

Lucas is the hero we never knew we needed | Image: ABC

When Lucas barrelled into the PCPD last week, ready to pin a "crime of passion" on Pascal, Detective Joe Fitzpatrick wasn't sure what to make of this man. But now he knows that Lucas was a man in love who would do anything to bring anyone responsible for Marco's death down. And he did it with such satisfaction and finesse.

It's the unlikely heroes who are the best heroes. Some might have said that Lucas was in over his head and didn't have street smarts, but way too many people underestimate him. Sonny sure did and it shows. While Lucas bringing down the big bad (or at least bringing him lower, the big bad is still out there) was unexpected and out of character for the good doctor, sometimes the unexpected is just what we need.

And who really expected Lucas to emerge as the unlikely and unsung hero in this plot? When Lucas met Marco in a Florida hotel bar last year, we never imagined him living in Wyndemere and trying to catch the bad guys a year later. No version of Lucas has ever done this before and we love this version and want to keep him.

The fact that it's pretty clear that Lucas' next love interest is a cop will keep the character in his action hero mode, which is where we like him. And that brings us to another cop who thinks he's a hero, but oh my, is he not.

What He Did For Lust

Chase is a hero in his own mind | Image: ABC

Is it lust? Or is it just plain being stupid? We are not sure when it comes to Harrison Chase, but please, just give him the hook already. How much longer can we watch this man simp for this absolutely awful young woman who doesn't see anything at all wrong with her actions because it's all for her children, which makes it all a-ok.

That big dope jumped right into the lake and was ready to call an ambulance because his precious wilting flower scraped her knee on...something after SHE jumped into the lake. That's right, Chase. Willow jumped. Ava didn't push Kristina out the window. She tripped over a duffel bag. And Tracy didn't shove Willow into the lake. She saw you coming and went straight into ditzy damsel mode. And Chase went into Dumbest Character on Soaps mode, right on cue.

Even Willow was stunned when he arrested Tracy for...nothing. Wait until he has to arrest Willow for...nothing.

Jordan Caused Her Own Damn Accident

Curtis is the delusional non-hero none of us want | Image: ABC

Are we supposed to see Curtis as the hero here and feel any sympathy whatsoever for Jordan? If we are, something in the script is not translating onto the screen, no matter how much sad and dramatic music cues accompany Jordan's long stares into the mirror with the scarf that doesn't even cover her scars.

Perhaps this story was just so ill-conceived from the start that nobody knows how to even get out of it. As it stands, Brook Lynn, who thinks she was the one who Jordan nearly killed that night, is setting Willow up to take the fall, but take the fall for what?

And that's the whole problem with this story. Nobody did anything wrong except for Curtis and Jordan. Curtis never should have leaned in to kiss Jordan while she was driving and Jordan never should have leaned over to kiss Curtis. And the other driver? They didn't hit Jordan. They drove on and had no idea that the car that had almost killed them crashed into an embankment.

So again, what is Willow even being framed for? Swiping a guardrail and driving on with their heart pounding cause some car veered head-on into their lane and almost killed them? Cause whoever the other driver was (it may not have even been Brook Lynn, as it seems all of Port Charles drives a black SUV), they didn't do anything wrong.

Meanwhile, we have Curtis and Jordan destroying the vibe at Portia's baby shower and making it all about themselves as they spit venom at poor Isaiah for what he did to them. Say what?!?!? What did he do to them? What did anyone do to these two awful people who caused their own problem? Curtis wasn't even the hero who got Jordan out of the car before it exploded. That was Valentin, so let's circle back to Lucas' story, which is almost everyone's story at this point but nobody knows it.

Some Heroes Have Laptops?

Cassius saved Josslyn who protected herself with a laptop | Image: ABC

The reason Lucas' sting operation wasn't perfectly successful is that Sidwell got away. That's right. Lucas went through all of that, was shot at multiple times (we could see that bulletproof vest a mile away, plus there was no blood), could have had his head blown off, and Cassius let Sidwell get away. Which we knew he would.

That means we get even more fun confrontations, but Cassius is an unlikely hero anyway. He has saved Josslyn multiple times now and did a better job than that laptop she was holding in front of her chest when Cullum broke out his knife. (Why does Cullum just not use a gun? Why does he have to kill people or try to kill people with knives and metal canes?) Cassius really is in over his head and wants to help his mother and this ditzy sorority girl, so we see him coming out an unlikely hero in all of this. But what about Jordan's hero? What is he going to do?

Call Z Before Carly Has a Real Stroke

Since Cullum likes to murder with knives, it would have been kind of fun to see Carly go after Cullum with that letter opener after seeing Josslyn's ring in the maid's hand. Now, THAT would have been a shock in the middle of the week, but we can't have nice things like that.

But we can have Carly and her attic boyfriend in Carly's kitchen, arguing back and forth about whether it's safe to go to Wyndemere. (When is it ever safe to go to Wyndemere?) Carly went to Wyndemere. Carly realized Josslyn really is there. Carly needs Valentin's help, so is he gonna do it? Is he finally gonna call "Z," whoever it is that "Z" may be? Valentin risks returning to international prison and trading cells with Jason if he does, but he risked that when he saved Jordan from a mess of her own making.

A Medical Hero in a Year?

Sonny and Alexis also can't believe it | Image: ABC

Kristina's going to medical school. Every time we type it, every time we hear it, every time we think it, we laugh out loud. Of all the exit stories GH could have chosen, GH decided sending a character who must have graduated college online while we weren't looking was a stellar idea. But we guess we have to roll with it.

And roll with it we will for a year or two. Then, Kristina will return from California after an accelerated course, ready to set up shop at GH. Since this is a hospital soap after all, maybe this is all how it was meant to be. We think.

Till next week, Scoopers, when Josslyn might pick up a tablet as a Captain America shield, when Cullum comes wielding a lightsaber. (Disney tie-ins, anyone?)

Is Lucas your new favorite hero? Should Curtis be quiet? Does Chase need to go to the corner? And will Valentin finally make that phone call? Let us know what you think in the comments.