New year, who dis?: Beyond the Gates Two Scoops for the week of January 19, 2026

Vanessa entered her find out era on Beyond the Gates

Are y'all ready to go Beyond the Gates? This past week, Leslie got busted in a flash, Smitty wanted to play superhero, and Dani kissed the wrong husband. Elsewhere in the DMV, Shanice told Anastasia what show to watch, Kat was a better detective than a deterrent – and suddenly Chelsea was in ecstasy! Let's fill up those Two Scoops and find out what happened inside and outside the gates of Fairmont Crest!

So on Monday, the fictional world of GATES took a break (presumably for Martin Luther King Day) so the cast could chat with us about their fictional world. Is it awful to say I haven't seen it yet? Hey, I've been busy! Besides, my job here is to cover all the pretend stuff, and suddenly we've got some characters going very subtly into new directions. Shall we follow the arrows and see where they lead us?

PRODUCT PLACEMENT PLACARD:

TIDE: 1

The age of information

Leslie's vanity stood to get her into a world of trouble this week when she ran into Vanessa, who happily reported that the much-talked-about clinic was going to be named after Doug. Leslie Thomas of the Leslie Thomas Outreach Project wasn't at all about that, so she reached out to Joey with a very loud “I don't think so.” But then Joey reached into his pocket and flashed his nervy business partner with a flash drive!

Now, what is all this? Joey showed Leslie the files contained within – and, while she grumbled something about stuff not being over, the air was clearly let out of her tires. So what was on that damn flash drive? Could it actually be that Leslie is finally going to pay for her dual attempted murders because Joey, of all people, got the goods on her? I'd be sitting on the edge of my seat, but that would require moving.

Surely the soap knows that Leslie can't keep getting away with her crimes (okay, Joey can't, either, but one lawbreaker at a time, please) – if she's being set up to be exposed by Joey, I am so here for it. And while we're on the subject of paying pipers, Real Estate Barbie has been very busy passing out her Heart Attach cards (she even suggested that Nicole become a customer!), but this week she got a very bad Yelp review.

Actually, the complaint came from Lance, the husband of some woman named Lolly (get your adverbs here?), for whom Vanessa had been providing “dates.” Lance first called Van-Van and told her to cut Lolly off; when Joey found out about it, he wanted to handle Lance, but Vanessa insisted she could take care of Lance herself. Until Lance paid a visit and handled Vanessa!

Yeah, he was most displeased, and he essentially cited Vanessa's fooling around as the reason Doug had been driven to an early death. Ouch. Vanessa probably shouldn't have shot back that Lance was so bad in bed, his wife had no choice but to look for action elsewhere...because that cutting remark got Lance so riled up that he grabbed Vanessa's wrist hard enough to give her a bruise.

The widow McBride was lucky that Randy happened to show up and alter the altercation – but as soon as Lance stalked out, Randy called Joey with an update. Sir Armstrong now considered the Lance case “personal,” and when Vanessa breezed by the casino, he frowned that such a confrontation was the reason why he hadn't wanted her to go into business with him. Whatever shall you do, Vanessa?

Not that Vanessa doesn't deserve some karma. She's basically sold out her now-dead husband and both of her twins just so she can sit on Joey's throne, er, share Joey's throne. Heart Attach may just escape being illegal, but let's talk about that money laundering, shall we? Ooh! What if Lance finds out about it – or better yet, learns that Joey had Doug killed and throws that at Vanessa. The drama, y'all. The drama!

My secret (didja gitit yet?)

Lots of you had been griping lately that the Hawthornes only seemed to have a bedroom. Well, I hope you're satisfied! We know Naomi and Jacob were, because after Naomi decided to ditch the party celebrating her supposed negative result for the BRCA gene mutation, they moved on and had their own “party”...in their living room. See? GATES didn't forget about us!

It could only have been gleaned from Naomi's expression when she looked at her results that she had inherited the abnormality, but it was when she sat down with Dr. Ahn that she truly confirmed it. The doc wanted Naomi to have some sort of support system in place, yet she refused to tell anyone – because of Anita's cancer, but also because she and Jacob had just survived one earthquake and she didn't want to cause another one.

Ahn even covered when Nicole came by the nurses station and wondered why they were talking. Now that's service! But Naomi must have had some second thoughts, because as she breakfasted with Jacob, she started to bring up the subject, only to get blocked by the waitress – and his annoyance with having had to twist his police chief pop's arm so he could get the plum assignment he had been fiending for.

Then Izaiah inadvertently shut Naomi down, and, during the course of her chat with the brothers, Jacob slipped that he had been tasked with going undercover. Understanding the inherent dangers of such a mission, Naomi clammed up more than the clam chowder I'm sure Orphey Gene's serves. Oh, and get this. Jacob's looking to bust some vampires!

Well, not really, but as Marcel tried to edge Jacob out of the assignment, he sure made enough vampire jokes, because the plan was to impale a crime ring that dealt in blood plasma. Not that Jacob wasn't ready to draw blood when he saw the lipstick on Marcel's collar and flamed him for sleeping with the “it's-still-an-open-case psycho Leslie Thomas!” Whoo doggies! You mean they didn't close the investigation into her?

Because I'd totally come away with that impression last summer after they said that finding Leslie's DNA on the leather jacket and the scratched helmet seen on the motorcyclist who had run Laura off the road in the surveillance video wasn't enough to score a conviction. Between this quick mention and whatever info Joey has on her, Leslie might want to start checking her height to make sure she's not standing in quicksand.

So Elon gave Jacob the case, but the next thing he did was run to Joey and make sure he wasn't connected to the blood plasma ring. “I deal in vices, not veins,” Joey deadpanned. However, Armstrong did alert Elon that he knew the syndicate was run by a dude who called himself “The Impaler” (because of course he does), and he was no one to fool around with. Joey wanted Jacob to be warned!

Meanwhile, it turned out that the “source” who had hipped Jacob to the whole bloody mess was our trusty Smitty – and Smits didn't want to let it go at that. He wanted to help Jacob nab the bad guys, both from a sense of justice, and because doing so would earn him the respect that his puff pieces weren't providing. Jacob wasn't having it, but Smitty pushed, and Jacob gave in. This should be interesting.

Definitely interesting was that Smitty mentioned how well he and Jacob had worked together while digging up dirt on Marcel. Remember who else has more than once worked well with Jacob? Miss Kat Brat, of course! And she was back on the case, smelling a rat when she found Jacob and Smitty in hushed conference together, and tasting Smitty's drink when he claimed they had just come from a workout.

Yeah, if vodka has electrolytes in it, that is. See how coolly and easily Kat put that together? Who was on top of it when Chelsea went missing? And who got more evidence on Leslie than Jacob's entire precinct? If Kat hadn't given up her sleuthing, Leslie would be in jail right now – and she wouldn't be relegated to bitching about Eva, which has gotten old. You think Eva helped Leslie, right, Kat? So channel that energy into something productive! She's actually very good at detective work.

Circling back around, Naomi kept her own secret, but confided it in Ashley, who's also at her best when she's at work. After Naomi explained how she couldn't siphon off the support the family was giving Anita, and that Jacob couldn't afford to be distracted doing his undercover work, Ashley agreed to zip her lip. So now it's Ash keeping Naomi's secret instead of Jacob keeping Derek's? I'm beginning to wonder just how trustworthy any of these besties really are.

I like the way (The kissing game)

Guess who popped in for her first visit of 2026? Lynette, who was none too pleased to have received an invoice from Bill's law firm totalling $17,100. Well, what did she expect, a voucher to get 50% off her first purchase? Hayley didn't like all of Lynette's talk about doing something desperate, so she offered to see if Bill would proceed with the case pro bono (read: free). This satisfied Lynette, at least for now.

Hayley was not satisfied, but she and Randy agreed that the move was the best way to keep Lynette from running her mouth, presumably about their mutual pasts. But then can you believe Hayley cussed Randy out for not doing enough for her! Dude! “Cuz” only brought you fake blood and poison. Hmm. Wonder if the poison's fake as well? That would explain why Bill never seems to be sick after three straight months of “tea.”

Mrs. Shamilton was also on a tear because she was afraid she was going lose Bill to Dani before she could make Bill lose his money – and his life. It didn't help her that, over at the country club, Leslie noticed how much attention Bill wasn't paying Hayley and smirked that her “long game” was running out of time. If only Leslie knew just how astute she was. With Andre out of town, Dani dropped by Bill's office with edibles from his favorite Cuban restaurant.

Talk inevitably turned to Dani carrying the BRCA gene variant and the heightened risk Dani had of developing cancer. She shot way into one potential future and worried that, if she had to have surgery to cut out a tumor, her body would no longer be perfect and Andre wouldn't want her anymore. Superficial, but that's Dani. Bill would have none of it and declared that nothing could dim Dani's light no matter how hard it tried.

And before you know it, Dani was kissing Bill. Again! Girl! That's so last year! Bill wasn't exactly not into it – and finally Dani stopped things, discombobulated and saying it couldn't happen again. Only thing was, Tomás, who Bill thought he'd sent home, saw every damn thing through the blinds. And Bill wasn't blind to the fact that every damn thing was what Tomás had seen.

The next day, Dani arrived again and Bill got on her case about the poor optics, especially now that Tomás had gotten an eyeful. Dani about dared Bill to throw her out, but that led to them kissing again, and Bill was about ready to use his desk as a heart-shaped bed. Until...psyche! He was only having a fantasy. Amazing he was able to stand up, if you know what I mean, when Tomás did him out of his daydream.

Bill pivoted into talking about how dedicated Tomás was, and when Tomás declared that he most absolutely had Bill's back, Bill promoted him to junior partner right then and there! Hmm. If this was a bribe for Tomás's silence – and if Tomás understood that it was – none of that was spoken. I guess Tomás won't be blackmailing Bill, since he finally got what he wanted. But Kat ain't gonna be too happy, is she?

In real life, Dani met with Pamela at Uptown, but her ride-or-die was decidedly upset to learn that Dani had locked lips with her ex yet again. Though Dani provided excuses for her behavior, Pamela's simple rebuke was “Don't ruin it,” as in her marriage to Andre. I mean, duh. Dani says she adores 'Dre but can't keep her lips off of Bill. Not that I can exactly blame her. Have you seen how Bill looks in a suit?

Then the ladies entered into a discussion about the Curtis-Dupree – er, Dupree-Curtis Modeling Agency. And they spoke about it as if the doors were open for business. When did that happen? And do we really think Dani Dupree would have a grand opening without throwing a huge party at the country club to announce it? From what we've seen on screen, this puppy is still in the planning stages. After pushing a year.

Anyway, they had some big gig to cast and they needed a male model with “unique features.” Well, who should walk in but Izaiah with his My Favorite Martian dreads that some of you absolutely hate? (I'm cool with them, by the way.) Izaiah seemed to be too busy with Eva for Dani or Pamela to approach him, but is our academic advisor heading for the runway? Banneker better offer Supermodel 101!

My love is the shhh!

Well! No sooner than I mention that Kial hadn't made an appearance since his second episode December 10 does he show up on our screens. And nearly flirting with Vanessa at that. (Nice touch, faking us out by making it look like she was handing him a Heart Attach card when it only ended up being one from her real estate business.) But Kial, for real – what was up with asking Shanice for intel on Carlton?

That would indicate that he views Dr. Fitzgerald as some kind of competition. And dude...he ain't. More like, you ain't. You squired Nicole around WinterFest for a couple of hours and gave her a neck massage. Has Nicole called you once since Carlton got back into town? Methinks not! Even Nicole referred to you as “a fun distraction” and told Carlton to his face that he was the one she had a connection with.

Yeah, so I don't know why they have Kial inserting himself as if he has a chance in hell with Nicole. I'm fine with the idea of escorting Nicole to WinterFest as an entrance strategy for Kial, but this turn this week made Kial seem either dumb or creepy...or both. And surely we didn't bring the Greg Vaughn in for that, did we? Did we? Please don't tell me we're positioning Nicole as the unifying corner of a triangle.

Carlton, not jazzed that Nicole didn't see monogamy in her near future – but satisfied that she was way more into him than Kial – took her out to dinner ahead of their theatre date. But lo! Another new couple was heading to the country club as well. See, that Obelisk restaurant Ted wanted to treat Shanice to was closed for a private event. So...ya know...where else to go in this town?

Shanice worried about running into Nicole and at least wanted to give Ted's ex a heads-up first. But when she tried, Nicole got called to the ER, so Shanice had no choice but to put on her sassy purple dress and walk into Fairmont Crest on Ted's arm. And wouldn't you know, gossipy Miss Anastasia herself stepped up on the newly-dating couple and sniffed that Ted had traded “thoroughbred” Nicole in for “untamed mustang” Shanice!

“I'm sorry, but did Antiques Roadshow just compare me to a wild horse?” Shanice cut in right away. OMG, but I love Shanice's clapbacks! What is it they say, you don't step on Superman's cape, you don't spit into the wind, and you don't trip on a sistah like Shanice? Anastasia kept trying it, so Shanice popped her balloon by rating her an “overbred filly” that “no one wanted to ride anymore.” Ted looked completely mortified...and then unmistakably amused!

Ms. Johnson's confidence faded a little bit, though, when her prediction came true and Nicole entered the banquet room with Carlton. Those two actually looked far more upset than Ted, who waved the whole thing away and showed Shanice to the table he'd had decorated for her. I don't know if Nicole opting to sashay out promising Carlton carnality was her acting out of jealousy, but Ted and Shanice had a similar idea...though it looked like they at least finished dinner first.

Yes, at virtually the same time, Nicole and Carlton (Narlton? Cicole?) and Ted and Shanice (Tanice? Shed?) each had their inaugural groove-getting-on. Look, it's a fact: Shanice and Ted are fiyah together, and, though a bunch of you have it out for Carlton, he and Nicole seem really good together. You know a Ted/Nicole reunion wouldn't work because it was a different Ted that Nicole had her happy marriage with!

Oh! But Shanice's next-day giddiness was temporarily hampered by a furious Leslie, to whom Eva had finked about Ted dating. Why did Eva do that? That was up there with when Eva let Leslie know that Ted was all drunk and whatnot, and look what that led to. (Their having sex, in case you forgot.) Eva! You gots to switch out your lip gloss for some Krazy Glue, gurl!

Anyway, when Leslie's Level One menacing didn't work on Shanice, she upped to Level Two and was ready to “drag [her] across this tile by [her] scalp” – but Shanice, ever unaffected, simply told Leslie that she was going to call security, who would immediately take her to the psych ward. Leslie slinked (slunk?) out, but man, Shanice is so kick-ass. She needs to be bumped up to a contract player, stat!

Knife talk

Tyrell surprised his fam by telling them that he needed a new tux for the cotillion, but the only new information we got out of that was when Samantha blabbed that Jessica was only going to the gala because it would look good on her application to UCLA. Looks like she's still dead set on going to that college. How is that going to work when Tyrell ends up going to Banneker? Unless Ty bails on higher education altogether.

Actually, Aunt Kat is the one who needs schooling. She gave father Ted a verbal smackdown for having the audacity to tell the terrible awful Eva that she had tested negative for BRCA – but Ted was done with his “apology tour.” Kat couldn't let it go and proceeded to call Eva the family's “genetic aberration.” Ted was not happy with that comment, and Kat was deflated when he said he loved all his children equally.

Father and daughter announced that they couldn't even look at each other...and Ted was certain that, one day, Kat was going to need Eva. Huh! That's the second time that idea has come up...which can only mean it's coming. What, Kat gets too close to exposing Leslie and gets kidnapped by her, so Eva has to save her? The half-sibs are in a car accident together? Something's gonna happen with this talk. And soon.

We've seen Kat make the rounds to her other relatives about Eva before, and once again, Kat got the same results: the words “get over it.” Only this time, Nicole was more aware of life's tenuousness owing to her mother's cancer and felt that Kat shouldn't waste her time with hate. Kat got real for a minute and said she didn't even know how to stop hating Eva. It was one of The Brat's better moments.

Kat didn't have any better luck with Martin and sighed that no one would “deliver [her] from Eva.” (Oh, OK! That's a reference to an LL Cool J movie from 2003. Pasty white guy like me wouldn't have known that!) That was when Samantha jumped in and said she had freed herself by coming around to forgiving June for her abandonment. It would be helpful for Kat to envision herself not hating Eva...and then to picture being Eva. As I said earlier, Kat's Haterade is reaching its expiration date. She's a much better character when she's focusing on something else!

I got a story to tell

Chelsea is probably the one DMV denizen to make the sharpest turn this week, and an expected (yet somehow fitting) one at that. The youngest Hamilton sister was getting bored at the fam's non-BRCA celebration and even hoped that Dani and Hayley would throw down to make it more entertaining. They didn't, so Chels bounced as soon as she got a text from Madison...who was immediately sorry she'd sent it.

No sooner than the purse designer and the neurologist got to Uptown did Chelsea run into old acquaintance Malik. Was Malik a model like Chelsea had been, Madison wanted to know? Nope! Not unless he strutted down the runway dressed as a pill bottle. (So chic.) Malik was revealed to have once been Chelsea's dealer, and free samples he did have. Chelsea jumped on 'em like a kindergartener chomping SweeTarts.

Whoa, what? Madison was heartsick, and it took me a while to recover from hydroplaning on the Information Superhighway. There was no mistake that we were talking about ecstasy (MDMA), a party drug that makes sense for former model Chelsea to have had access to during her runway days. And Madison, being a neurologist, of course knew just what adverse affects the pill would have on the brain.

But it was sudden, wasn't it? Chelsea is just sort of boppin' along and then we learn it's pills she's poppin'? And poor Madison, too – when she practically plotzed that Chelsea had taken one right in front of her and reacted by refusing to join her GF on the dance floor, Chelsea sashayed away with a “Later, baby.” Cold hearted like Paula Abdul! Hard right, eh? And sorry Chels, but equating your concerned love Madison with controlling “momager” Dani didn't earn you any sympathy points.

Maybe Derek's taking something, too, because he's really acting weird. Finding Grayson and Ashley at Orphey Gene's (talking about his cat, no less), the fired-up firefighter sat right down at their table and started getting all up their beeswax. Ashley did her best to let it roll off, but once Grayson wanted to leave, she asked him to wait outside for her while she had a chat with her ex.

“What the hell, Derek?” That was EXACTLY what I said to my monitor right before she said it! Whatever soft spot Ash had for Derek was gone, and I liked it. She came right out and accused him of trying to sabotage her date – and she figured out that Derek had ratted her out to Jan about seeing Grayson. (Jan had a scene this week, too, where Mona said it was hypocritical for her to think Ashley was moving too fast when she was already considering the just-met Owen “the one.” You go, Mona!)

Derek mumbled some crap about oh I thought Jan knew anyway, but Ashley refused to co-sign his bull and left her ex sitting at the diner faster than wait staff could say “your okra is up.” Is this what we're doing with Derek now? He's gonna be stalking Ashley and interfering in her relationship? Unless D knows something about G that we don't...some of you have suggested that Grayson is involved in the blood plasma ring because he's a lab tech! Insert thinking emoji here.

Finally, there is Nita Nita, who exasperatedly decided she'd rather be in chemo than sit at home listening to Leslie's shouse builders across the street. Dose #2 was nigh, and Anita informed Vernon that, this time, Sharon would be keeping her company. Vernon was glad to hear it but quietly asked Sharon to call him if a problem arose. Anita didn't have any problems. She just wanted to engage in some real talk about one potential outcome of her cancer, since she couldn't get into it with her family.

No, Anita had been researching estate planning after Vernon was all tucked in for the night, and she'd even landed on a final arrangement where your cremains are fashioned into nourishment for a tree seed. I have to admit...I've been thinking about that for years. How cool would it be, becoming one with the earth and giving life to a tree? I felt seen.

Sharon was the first to remind Anita that the mind affects the body (or “life is in the power of the tongue,” as she put it). However, Anita's fellow Articulette understood where Anita was coming from and promised her that, should she lose to her tumor, she and everyone else would make sure Vernon didn't become one of those grieving spouses who passed away soon after the other did. (That actually happened with my dad and my stepmother.)

Anita was treated to a hymn that Sharon vocalized; after she got home, Vernon was pleased that his beloved had gotten a private concert. But before Anita could expound on it, she slurred her words and fell into a dead faint on the couch! Oh no! But don't worry, y'all – so many of you think GATES is going to kill Anita off, but please.

There's been no word of Tamara Tunie's contract being up. They're just going to squeeze every precious drop of drama out of this story as they can. And I'm glad they're taking Anita through the process of chemo instead of her being sick off screen and then suddenly getting some miracle cure. Chemo is a bitch! Anita's body is just reacting to the stuff

This brings us to the end of another Two Scoops, D.C. Edition. I wanna hear all your thoughts about Beyond the Gates '26 in the comments below. And until next we meet, Scoopers, live your life beyond!

(Purchase Adam-Michael James' ”Bewitched” books on Amazon.)

(Listen to isletunes, AMJ's podcast featuring nothing but music from the artists of Prince Edward Island, Canada.)